So my stigmata is acting up again

On my way home from the airport after an afternoon in Charlotte, North Carolina, I was getting tailgated by a BMW.  This comes as no surprise as scientifically proven, 100% of BMW drivers are douchebags.  To make matters worse, I could see in the rearview mirror that it was a black guy with a big gold watch, leaned over across the passenger seat like black guys stereotypically position themselves while driving.  Since I see absolutely no point in altering my driving stance to accommodate a douchebag, I maintain the course, and they can pass me when it’s convenient for them.  Eventually, the opportunity presents itself, and he blows past me.  His license plate reads “BLCKCZR.”  If this is trying to say “Black Czar,” which was the first thought that popped into my head, my head just exploded.  It’s like racism, hypocrisy, wrapped in more racism, encased in a douchebaggy BMW.  Incredible.

Photos: Atlanta Braves 2011 Home Opener

It’s amusing to me how this year, so many teams are doing these grandiose WWE-style entrances for the players for their home openers, with the Braves being no exception on their own opener.  It pales in contrast to the prior year, where it was traditional lineups and fan applause instead, but whatever floats their boat.  Despite the fact that the Phillies were on the table for the home opener, I didn’t want to miss out on breaking in a new season of watching baseball at the home park.

There were a few noticeable differences around the park this year, with a lot of renovations being done to hopefully improve commerce within the gates throughout the course of the season.  Instead of the legion of clone food stands, there’s actually a little bit more variety with consumable options.  Where as previous years, there were the same crappy fan gear being sold in the merch stands of varying sizes, they actually have some variety in brands and labels throughout the park.  And despite not ever having anything I’m remotely interested in purchasing, the team clubhouse store was impressively renovated.  Color me impressed.

One thing I am not impressed about though is this year’s Tomahawk Team.  I think the standards of what makes a glorified Braves cheerleader have really gone down throughout the last two years, and I’m very amused by the litany of fake names that many of them are obviously using.  Seriously, “Aria?”  Someone must be a Mass Effect 2 fan.  And if that’s the case, I’d totally be interested, if not for the three pounds of makeup, fake tan, and eh well, I’m not one to speak, but whatever, butterface.

So glad baseball’s back.  Braves chased off Cliff Lee in three innings, and ended up winning 6-3, which ruled.

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