The escalating stupidity of “house divided” paraphernalia

Down here in the college football ever-loving south, where license plates are not a mandatory thing on the front of the cars, novelty plates like the above are a pretty common thing. Especially the HOUSE DIVIDED plates that really like to drive home the notion that a couple, each member having gone to a different college, is ironically living with a collegiate arch-nemesis, based on popular rivalries.

House divided plates are pretty common down in Atlanta especially, since Atlanta is widely recognized as the unofficial center point of SEC country, and everyone seems to recognize the SEC as the undisputed dominant super power conference of college football. But regardless, at least once a day, it’s almost unavoidable to see a house divided plate in the city.

The thing is, at least in most cases it makes sense. Georgia/Alabama, Alabama/Auburn, Auburn/Florida. And then it goes inter-conference sometimes with Florida/Florida State, Florida State/Clemson, Clemson/South Carolina, etc, etc.

Frankly, as long as the rivalries seem somewhat justifiable and/or legit, I have no objection to it. If anything at all, it’s more of a positive nuance to recognize that in spite of the Romeo and Juliet perception between fans of opposing programs, when the day is over, people don’t give a flying fuck about collegiate alliances, in the name of love.

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The answer is always yes

In moments of frustration, have you ever asked the types of rhetorical questions that are directed to people responsible for said frustration, regardless of if they can even hear you or not?

“Is _____ really that difficult?”
“Is your job really that difficult?”
“Is driving a car really that hard?”
“Is it really that difficult to use your turn signal?”
“Is it really that difficult to re-rack your weights?”
“Is it really that hard to wipe down that bench?”
“Is parallel parking really that hard?”
“Is parking really that difficult?”
“Is it really that hard to check your email?”
“Are you really that stupid?”
“Are you really that dense?”
“Are you really that oblivious?”

And the list goes on and on.  I ask these kinds of things often.  Sadly, it’s taken me longer than it probably takes other people to realize that in 100% of these inquiries, the answer is always yes.

So lately, whenever I reflexively blurt out these questions, or ask these things in my head, I actually have to consciously remind myself that the answer yes.

When it comes to the rhetorical questions, inquiring about the difficulty of common human behaviors, the answer is always yes.

That being said, I am apparently very good at many, many, many difficult things.

Are toys fun when they’re OP?

O·Padj. (pron. oh-pee).  Acronym for “overpowered.”  Established as video game slang; used to describe when a particular character, weapon or item is opinionated to be excessively effective, to the detriment of the claimer’s opinion, but has capabilities of being applied in uses outside of exclusively video games.

In the case of action figures, protagonists that are three times the size of their antagonists, could be classified as being OP.

I saw this commercial for these Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles action figures, and the first thought that came into mind was “are you fucking kidding me?”  Gigantic TMNT action figures to do battle with Foot Clan villains that are a third of their size?  Is that even remotely possibly fun for kids?

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Knowledge is horsepower

Conversely, that means a lack of knowledge means your car might be slower than it should be.

Long gone are the days when I used to relish in the occasional red light skirmish; trying to get to point B from the green light faster than a car in an adjacent lane.  But nowadays I’m older, I just don’t really care about it anymore, and frankly the cost of fuel is more than justifiable enough to not hit 6,000 rpm in first gear and second gear, just to prove that my car is faster than another.

But when a 3rd generation Mitsubishi Eclipse deliberately pulls up next to me with the intent of attempting to pass me on an upcoming merge point, so that they don’t have to wait behind the three cars behind me, I decided that could turn the clock back a little bit.

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Things Dwyane Wade won’t be able to buy anymore

Not long ago, I wrote about how opt-out clauses are kind of killing professional sport, and a whole bunch or rambling about how at the root of all opt-out clauses, is more greed. In every instance I mentioned, the people who opted out of millions of dollars ultimately signed contracts worth even more money, displaying what I feel are truly disgusting rich-getting-richer scenarios.

Ultimately, what I failed to say when I wrote that, was that I would love to see an instance where a guy opts out of his contract, only for it to backfire and blow up in his face, and they’re unable to better the numbers in which they opted out of. Because that would be just dessert for someone getting greedy, and being rudely awakened when the number crunchers and bean counters of sports franchises realize the favor they’ve been granted, and the money they don’t have to spend to acquire their talents.

Fortunately, I didn’t have to wait that long after making my post for it to actually come to fruition.

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Getting a mental edge

Whenever the term “mental edge” comes to mind, I think about Dual Survival, and how Joe Teti uses the phrase at least once every single episode.  But the instance that stands out the very most of Joe’s constant pursuits of mental edges was the one episode where Joe and Cody were in some desert, and like in most cases, dehydration was a massive issue.

Despite Cody’s logical (and truthful) objections to doing so, Joe insisted on drinking his own urine.  And despite fully agreeing with Cody’s rationale why drinking urine while teetering on the edge of dehydration was a bad idea, Joe overruled logic, stating that simply getting the feeling of wetness in his mouth would give him the mental edge needed to persevere in the desert a little bit longer, even if the source of said wetness was his own piss.

Joe pissed into a helmet and drank his own piss.

For that mental edge.

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I’m convinced

Back in the day, there was Xanga.  Xanga was a blogging platform that coincided with the time of like LiveJournals and any other blogging sites.  Anyway, there was a popular perception that Xanga was the blog choice for all Asian people, given the fact that 4 out of every 5 Xanga sites seemed to be run by an Asian blogger.

Perception becomes reality to the eye of the beholder.

I’m convinced that when it comes to costume photography, DeviantArt is pretty much anyone not in the United States.  4 out of every 5 times whenever I see a picture that I think is really striking, and I wish to see more of it, and the rabbit hole eventually leads to me to a DA account, I’ll notice that the user’s profile states that they either live somewhere in South America or Europe.  So much for those opportunities to cyber-stalk fantasize about meeting these people in person to crush on and hope to fancy with my wit and charm.

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