SSDPSTBUS

Same Shit, Different Public Swindling Tax Burdening Unnecessary Stadium. 

Obvious, wasn’t it?

The irony is that it might sound like my exclusively sour grapes at my disagreement to the existence of ScumTrust Park, but such an egregiously overblown acronym can seamlessly be utilized by any one of the many sports venues constructed within the last 15 years that were constructed under similar shady circumstances.

But anyway, surprising nobody at all, the Braves are performing at the level they are expected to, regardless of the fact that they are somehow in second place in the absolutely dreadful NL East.  It’s not their fault that there are a litany of other teams that are somehow miraculously worse than the Braves, and it makes me feel like I have to do math and show my work to prove that there are enough teams with good of records as there are as many teams with abysmal, worse-than-the-Braves records out there.

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Too easy

Readers formerly known as my six readers might know that I have this strange fascination with trucks full of food stuffs crashing on the highway.  And throughout the years, especially in Georgia, we’ve seen quite a smorgasbord of food overturned onto the roads, from hams, beer, potato chips, more beer and turkeys spilled in magnificent messes, due to mostly the negligence of the drivers of these delectable consumables.

And throughout it all, I’ve always had something to say about each such incident, mostly overly sarcastic remarks about how the food spilled onto Georgia highways could amount to one massive banquet had the food not been declared inedible on account of it spilling onto asphalt.

But this incident, with a truck full of watermelons spilling onto the I-85/I-985 split up in Suwanee?  I got nothing.  Sometimes, there are some things that just write themselves, or the pictures do all the talking, and when a truck full of watermelons dumps its entire load onto the highways, resulting a temporary but complete closure of the road so that GDOT crews can basically sweep red sticky sweet slush and rinds off of the road, there’s really not much to add, without the humor going very inappropriate in the process.

What a visual though.  It’s absolutely everything that you’d expect to see upon hearing a watermelon spill.  I’d imagine that if I were trying to leave the city northbound, and then came to a complete standstill for reasons unknown, I’d probably eventually become livid.  But upon the even the eventual crawl through of ground zero, and seeing wet roads, red slush and rinds all over the shoulders, I’d probably end up laughing maniacally at the ironic reveal.

Whatever though, add it to the list!  Watermelons.  Might make a decent dessert option in the never ending buffet of food lost to the Georgia highway system.