I couldn’t have asked for a more appropriate savior

Just a few weeks after I’d declared my utter disgust over the mainstream uncoolness of Bullet Club, it’s almost as if bookers from New Japan Pro Wrestling read my words, and did something about it.  Surely, I’m not the only wrestling fan out that there that thinks the Bullet Club is worse than DJ Tanner Wrestling these days, and I was ecstatic to see the next rival stable emerge and basically declare war on them.

But that stable being composed of none other than the legendary god-beast and toughest motherfucker on the planet, Haku, and his two sons Tama and Tanga?  I couldn’t possibly have dreamed of a better or more appropriate person and his offspring to systematically decimate all the rest of Bullet Club by themselves.

Seriously, I think Haku became a bigger star than he ever was during his career, after it ended, due to the evolution of the internet as well as all the former wrestlers out there who released autobiographies.  Be it through shoot interviews on YouTube or in personal memoirs, suddenly anyone who was in the business between the 80s into the early 2000s had a Haku story to share, because back in those times, the boys always ended up at bars or dives, and it wasn’t nearly as well known that wrestling was scripted, and local tough guys always wanted to start shit with wrestlers. 

Despite the fact that general sentiment shared by most about Haku is that he’s a gentle and respectful person who just wants to mind his own business and provide for his family, he seems to be a magnet for trouble, and almost always ends up on the receiving end of harassment, to which the monster comes out when he’s forced to defend himself.  Guys getting eyeballs ripped out, noses bitten off, fish hooks and broken teeth, most idiots don’t seem to realize the idiocy in provoking a 300 lb. Tongan in a bar.  Even the cops weren’t safe from the wrath of Haku, when they had to try and either incapacitate or outright arrest him; tales of him snapping off handcuffs, inhaling the mace they tried to spray him with to simply beating the shit out of cops, nobody was safe once the monster got woken.

After hearing all these tales of how he was the baddest motherfucker on the planet, it was a shame that the vast majority of his wrestling career was over, save for the sporadic cameo appearance in the indies.  It was well documented how smoothly his everyday life was going in retirement, managing the detailing department of a Toyota dealership down in Florida.  After all this knowledge was made available of how dangerous of a man Haku really was, who wouldn’t want to see him get in the ring and decimate an endless number of wrestlers who may look more polished and chiseled, but have a fraction of the legitimate toughness of Haku.

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