Tag: fantasy

Was The Leftovers supposed to be a horror story or Damon Lindelof’s personal fantasy?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

This is actually a post that I’ve kept in my back pocket for a while, and one that I knew that I had to be in the right frame of mind before I could actually write it.  I had to be in an agitated mood, which is hard to imagine a person like me not being in an agitated mood, but I also needed to have the time necessary to put my thoughts to keyboard.

But not just any agitated mood, but one specifically where I’m feeling like there are just too many fucking people in the world, and how I’d wish a ton of people would just spontaneously vanish, like Thanos’s Snap or, and in the context of this specific post, like in the plot of The Leftovers.

Now [spoiler alert] because I’m going to go ahead and just probably spoil a bunch of things for those of my zero readers whom might actually be interested in watching this show in the future, despite the fact that at this point it’s like ten years old.

But the basic plot of the show in the beginning is that for absolutely no apparent reason at all, 2% of the entire earth’s population just spontaneously vanished.  Nobody knows whether they were killed, were transported, were abducted or whatever, the point is that 2% of the earth’s population just mysteriously disappeared, and that 2% might sound small, but still equated to about 140 million people.

[Spoilers begin] It turns out at the end of the series, the answer to The Disappearance is that the 2% did not die, or cease to exist, they were simply transported to basically, another version of the world where they were the only ones on the planet.  To them, 98% of the planet mysteriously vanished, and they clearly had it way worse than their counterparts, because with 98% of the planet’s population disappearing, that’s a whole fuckton of global infrastructure that’s gone with it.

And such is actually explained, that as a result of the planet becoming so sparsely populated, a lot of shit did kind of go primal, and stuff like the grid becoming unreliable, things such as transportation, flight, and science crashing to near halts, but the 2% of humanity does survive.  They acknowledge, adapt and survive, and as time passes, people move on with their lives.

All of this is explained as one of the main characters, late in the series, Nora, who lost her husband and both her children in The Disappearance, finds a scientist in Australia who claims to have figured out what had happened, and had invented a machine that could transport subjects into the alternate world, goes to the alternate world, discovers that her family, after dealing with the shell shock of their own Disappearance and the loss of a wife and mother, moved on.  So, as not wanting to traumatize her family with a miraculous reappearance, she decides to go back to her world, but is rudely awakened to the idea that a world with 98% less people in it, is just a little bit behind scientifically, and basically has to wait decades before the invention of the alternate world travel machine to be built so that she could return to her version of existence.

The point of explaining all of this is that every now and then, there are days of my own existence where I feel that there are just too many fucking people on this planet, and musing how liberating it must be to be on either end of a Disappearance.  Like days where I’m commuting to work, and wondering just why there are so many fucking cars on my route on some days versus others (the existence of I-285).  Or when I’m going to Costco and the parking lot is practically entirely full, and there are 107 cars in line for gas on top of everything.  Or when I go out of the house to run a quick errand and there’s a surreptitiously high amount of cars also on the road or at the stores, and I’m thinking what the fuck.

It sure would be nice if 140 million of these motherfuckers just bamf’d to alternate world and alleviated my world of their existence.  Or better yet, I get to be one of the lucky 2%-ers who gets to have a wide open fucking empty version of the world where there’s tremendously way less chance of people fucking up my daily rhythm just by existing in close proximity to me.

I figure Damon Lindelof came up with the general premise of The Leftovers to sound scary and ominous that such a wild global event could occur, but on days like this where I’m sour over the knowledge of the world’s global 8 billion human beings, I begin to think that perhaps The Leftovers and The Disappearance might also be a fantasy.  Because on days like this, it definitely sounds like a dream come true to me, to be somewhere 98% less populated.

I’d definitely miss my kids and family though. 😢

Georgia Snow Day 2024

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

Photo 100% unedited.  Yep, totally

The best part about not having to go into the office is that the day before, the entire state was going into winter snow storm protect mode.  Thanks to Snowpocalypse a decade ago, the entire state is, preferably, always on the side of caution and quick to pull the trigger when it comes to shutting down the city over thinking they can handle any modicum of snow, because as Snowpocalypse showed the world, Georgia is not.

Sure, it was chilly and the temperatures were rapidly falling, but with the chance of precipitation vanishing, I knew there was no real chance that we were going to get any snow.  Black guys ice, sure, was a possibility, but I didn’t think there was much chance that we were going to get any white blanketing over any parts of the state.  All the same, the Metro Atlanta area was quick to pull the trigger and shut down all of the schools, and my building was quick to declare a delayed opening, which honestly if there’s one drawback to the advent of remote work, is the fact that seldom can we ever be able to use snow days as an excuse anymore for not wanting to go into the office.

In the early morning, since I’m always the first person up in my house, I let the dog outside, and unsurprisingly, it was dark, dreary, cold and blustery, but not a single snowflake appeared to be floating around anywhere in sight.  As I prepared the kids’ breakfast and the sun began to creep up, it looked like a gray and dreary day, but definitely no snow in sight.

Despite the fact that my office had a report time of 10 am, I punted on the day, since I had started working remotely at like 8:45, and I wasn’t about to pack up my shit, drive to the office to set up shop again, and risk burning an hour of relocation and commute time when I had already started working.  And much like responsible people in the workforce, I probably ended up working longer and more studiously working from home that day, because my workload was quite slammed, and I was pretty much on the clock all the way up til 5 pm, without taking much of a lunch break because I was in such a groove.

But it was during one of these moments where I poked my head out to get some air, did I notice that not only was there no snow, it was absolutely, majestically peaceful, sunny and beautiful outside, albeit a frigid 16F degrees and windy as fuck.  So I had to snap the above picture to send to my friends to show them what snow in Georgia looks like.  It’s not my fault if the birds and wildlife decided to celebrate in front of my camera like the start of a Disney Animated Classic.

Dad Brog (#125): a great idea to help reduce spreading sickness

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I was driving home from the pediatrician with #1 having a meltdown, which was a continuation of the meltdown from the process of getting ready to go to the pediatrician just 45 minutes prior, and unsurprisingly, I was feeling pretty sour.  Both my kids are currently sick going into the Thanksgiving holiday, and once again I’m imagining nuclear shits for the parents of the kids that got my kids sick, and annoyed with everyone who tries to tell me that that’s just the way things are and I shouldn’t get so worked up over it.

Today was a follow-up appointment from two days ago, since #1’s sickness seemed a little worse, and she had to not only go on meds obviously, but this time, we were sent home with a nebulizer, because it was that much worse than the ordinary cold this time around.  Thankfully it wasn’t COVID or RSV, but it’s still unknown to why she’s got a wheeze in her chest that kept her from getting much sleep the night prior. 

Either way, I was a bit furrowed in the brow when I was told that it was another $35 copay for the follow-up, but obviously American healthcare is basically the worst ATM in existence, but we were literally there for five minutes in the exam room.  #1’s weight was taken, blood pressure and oxygen levels measured.  A stethoscope to the chest for 90 seconds, and then we were done and out the door; but a follow-up in a week was requested, which means that’ll be another $35 copay for probably another five minutes to tell us that things are continuing on the mend.

So I’m driving home, and I’m thinking how great it would be if the parents who sent the kids who got my kids sick and started this whole debacle would have to be on the hook for the ~$140 in doctor visits and meds that I’ve shelled out, and then it brought me joy imagining if that really were something that were possible: accurate responsibility of spreading families to be held accountable for the expenditures of the families of people they got sick.

I’m sure that would change American attitudes about going into work sick, sending sick kids into schools, and wearing masks in public when things aren’t fully healthy.  Like a parent sends Little Jimmy into school, knowing they’ve got a cough and snotty nose.  And then 10 days later, they get an invoice in the mail saying they’re on the hook for a co-pay and meds for Little Sally, who’s in Little Jimmy’s class and sits next to them in the classroom.  Or Karen goes to Target while she is hacking and sneezing but doesn’t mask.  And then a week later, thanks to facial recognition, they’re identified and sent an invoice for the medical expenses of the rando that was in the aisle with them looking for OTC medication that now has the flu.

Obviously, none of this is really possible due to incubation periods of viruses and the extreme big brother-ing necessary to pinpoint transmission possibilities, but if it were, and people were to be held accountable for their poor decision when it comes to dealing with the sicknesses of themselves or their offspring, I’m sure people would be way quicker to pull the trigger in using that sick time or keeping their kids at home to reduce the possibility of transmission, and society as a whole benefits from the reduction of spreading of nuisance illnesses.

But wouldn’t I feel some consolation satisfaction at knowing that the deadbeat parents that sent their sick kid to school who got my kid sick and brought the plague into my household, had to pay my medical bills.  The thought of it, even as impossible as it may be, would bring me great joy, if it were.

I wish I were that Kaiju from Pacific Rim

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

The one that could generate EMPs.  Not because I want to cripple the electric-powered functionality of my adversaries and those whom I want to put in their places. 

To clarify, I wish I were that Kaiju from Pacific Rim that could generate EMPs, but really small, concentrated ones that I could use to cripple the phones of nearby people, who are doing some dumbass behavior with them, mainly stuff that distracts them from common sense, spatial awareness or just plain inconveniencing people around them, namely me.

I’d love to pop an EMP on the dumbass lady who always seems to be in front of me at the really, really short left turn light, who always seems to be paralyzed by her phone, and by the time she reacts and makes her turn, the light turns red and bones over a line of drivers in which at least 3-4 could’ve made the light with a more vigilant lead car.

I’d love to pop an EMP on the parade of shitters who come into my gym solely to use the bathroom to poop, since they all seem to collectively think it’s their private commode.  It’s worse off when they flush the toilet while I’m in the shower, because despite how modern of a building it is, it still has the dated pipes that make the shower water scalding upon a flush, and since it’s automated, some of the shit-filled choads will get it to flush 2-3 times while I’m trying to wash up after an actual workout.

But then the lady in the car holding up traffic, her car would ultimately fry out, making things worse, and it would be my fault.

But then the clowns of indigestion in my gym bathroom will have the automatic flushers go haywire on them, and then the toilets won’t flush and the locker room will smell like turds, and it would be my fault.

Okay, so let’s be very specific here, I really wish I were the kaiju from Pacific Rim who could generate EMPs, but very, very specific EMPs that affect only cell phones of others.  Because in addition to being an 80ft tall colossal monster that could destroy everything in my path, it would be pretty baller to be able to pinpoint snipe and take out the cell phones of shitheads that are a little too married to their phones.

To make the world a better place, of course.

2 Under 2: Days like today I’m over parenting (#075)

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I should be happy and excited right now.  I have received some very good personal news.  But I’m not.  I can’t be, because parenting two under two is soul sucking draining and there’s no room in my life for anything me, because I’m dealing with two crying kids all fucking day every fucking day and I have no idea when it will ever get any easier. 

#2 sucks at sleeping and doesn’t nap or stay asleep which already drains me daily, but has now devolved to where it encroaches into my one-on-one time with #1, because she’s insisting on waking up earlier than ever, despite not getting any more nap time or night sleep, so I am literally handcuffed to her from the moment I wake up until the moment I go to bed.  And to think she had one really perfect day earlier in the week where she slept until 8, had two perfect naps, and didn’t fight me Mortal Kombat when it came time to sleep.  

To make life any easier, #1 has apparently begun entering the terrible two phase where everything warrants crying and tantrums, and we’re talking real tears and snot and screaming and shunning.  And there will be moments in the day where both kids are crying, fussing, screaming, or all of the above to where I just have to stop, stand there still, and contemplate that this is where my life is at, and wondering, what. the. fuck. 

Obviously I’m not the only dad or any parent who’s ever been in this situation, but I would really like to know how other dads have fared or handled this specific scenario of simultaneously raising two under two, in similar aged kids to my own.  I need to know I’m not alone here, because I’m constantly overwhelmed, constantly overworked, often miserable, and at times completely over being a parent and just wanting a fucking break that will never happen because two under two is too much to ask of anyone to alleviate me of and I can’t rely on anyone and I don’t know any two people or don’t trust anyone to do a fraction of shit I do on a daily basis to get me one. 

I know that I’m not alone under these circumstances. I just want to hear it. 

But the disheartening thing is that I don’t know anyone in these circumstances. My friends and our generation itself are all so anti-kids or they have just one kid, or they’re fortunate enough to have family and other free care to lend hands, that it really does feel sometimes that I am alone.  

All I want for Christmas is a single day where I can turn off dad mode and live like a regular human being for a day.  Sleep without an alarm. Past 7 am. Eat when I want to eat and not when #1 eats so she doesn’t get pissed that I’m eating without her. To have a moment where I realize that I can run, write, or workout or watch tv for an hour without getting interrupted. Not be on double duty with two kids by myself for 3-5 hours a day.  Not to have to deal with pets.  To have an evening where I don’t have to sprint upstairs at a moments notice 3-5 times to pacify a kid because they can’t stay asleep.

Just one fucking day.  Happy Kwanzaa 

Oh, and my nanny just called in sick. Today’s going to be awesome.  Happy Hanukkah 

What if… Tim Tebow, the professional wrestler?

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

The other day, my bros and I were bullshitting about professional wrestling as is often times the norm, and the thought crossed my mind that AEW is low-key owned by the Jacksonville Jaguars, since owner Tony Khan is the son of the Shahid Khan that owns the Jags. 

Recently, I saw some blurb about how despite having signed with the Jaguars, the attempting-to-return-to-football Tim Tebow is no guarantee to make the team, even though he’s still built like a tank and trying to come back as a tight end and not a quarterback, and then the wheels got turning in my brain to do so fantasy booking in the event that Tebow flames out of football again, but instead of trying to pursue professional baseball, chooses professional wrestling instead.  Especially since there’s already a convenient transition from the Jags to AEW, being under the same family umbrella and all.

After about five minutes of bullshit, I realized that this hypothetical bullshit would be better served as brog material and not a passing conversation in private company, because some of these ideas would be fucking gold in an ironic sense if they were to come to fruition, even though there can hardly be fewer things in the world nerdier than fantasy booking professional wrestling.

Anyway, Tim Tebow is cut from the Jags, not for anything performance-related so much as is it that the Jags are an NFL team and NFL teams are more afraid than Gabriel is in The Walking Dead of anything and don’t want Tebow’s faith to ever be mentioned in the same breath as them.  He’s in the locker room, silently crying, cleaning out his personal effects, and our character arc begins with Tim saving a cross that he hung, for last, staring at it wistfully, thinking to himself why the good lord has failed to give him the strength he needed to make it back to the NFL.

Tony Khan enters the locker room, and gives Tebow some fluff about how he performed great, and how his failure to make the team had nothing to do with his talent.  But seeing as how he wasn’t going to make the team, and to not let such physical gifts go to waste, he offers Tebow an opportunity to join All Elite Wrestling, so he could still potentially have a platform to spread the word.

“Professional wrestling?” thinks Tebow.  The fake sport with fake storylines, so much of which is debaucherous, scandalous, and frequently sacrilegious?  Khan assures Tebow that AEW is different than those whom might have put out such unsavory product, and points no further than AEW’s own TNT Champion, Miro, God’s Favorite Wrestler, as proof of AEW’s respect and commitment to Christianity.  Tebow is intrigued, and agrees to a developmental tier-1 deal.

Continue reading “What if… Tim Tebow, the professional wrestler?” →

New Father Brogging, #007

~ dannyhong ~ Leave a comment

I can’t help but think that my life would be so much simpler if I were Goro from Mortal Kombat, or at least have four arms like Goro from Mortal Kombat.

So much of the time, I try to do anything at all, while carrying baby in one arm, and it turns out that I’m not very competent at doing a lot of things one-handed.  Making a cup of coffee.  Untying a knot.  Opening any sort of jar or bottle.

Having an extra arm, much less two extra arms would probably increase my general productivity tremendously, and I can only imagine the shit I could get done if two arms were spent placating a baby full-time, while still having two others arms in which I could do absolutely anything at all with.  And in the few instances where I can hold the baby in one arm and free up a third arm, then the world can gladly be my bitch in those few times.

I think what I’m really trying to say is that there’s often times in which I feel pretty overwhelmed with just how much stuff I have to do on a daily basis, on top of being a brand new dad.  Obviously, there is no set amount of attention and things I have to do with a newborn baby, but then there’s usually a cavalcade of chores and tasks that have to be done on a routine and/or daily basis on top of everything that makes me feel like I have no downtime, ever.

On the weekdays, I trudge out of bed after nights of interrupted sleep due to one or two mid-night feedings, and I hop on my work laptop and do my best to do, work.  Baby hangs out with me in the mornings, which isn’t really difficult considering she usually just sleeps in the Mamaroo next to me.  By the early afternoon, mythical wife tags in and takes over the majority of baby duty while I finish out my work day, but when my workday is over, I tag in to spell her from baby duty, but that kind of means I’m going directly from my workday into baby duty, and if I’m lucky, I can cumulatively have maybe an hour, possibly two hours in which I actually do stuff for myself.

And in that little time, I can’t really indulge in much; I don’t feel like I’ve got the time to binge stuff on Netflix, especially considering single episodes of the Korean shows I want to watch are all like 90 minutes each because Korea really loves longform and I can kind of see why I’m so long-winded now.  I can’t really start any video games, because I generally really like to have three, uninterrupted hours to really start any game, and no matter what, whether I somehow manage to have one or two hours to myself, seldom are they contiguous and without any sorts of interruptions.

Ironically, this has driven me to write more, because it’s an activity that’s easy to stop and start and be interrupted without worry about ruining the flow of a show or forgetting to what I was doing in a game. 

The fact of the matter is that I occasionally have days in which I feel like I don’t ever get any time for myself, and it’s a little deflating whenever those days occur.  Believe me, I know that I’m not in a position where my daughter isn’t ever going to not be first, but I always believe there’s importance in still getting some time for myself occasionally.

But if I were Goro, or at least had two extra arms like Goro, I could do so much shit at the same time as being hands-on with the baby, because she only needs two arms, and then I could accomplish so much else with the other two arms and maybe feel like I’m still getting some time for myself.