Sometimes there is no funnier reality television than the NBA

Somehow true: Portland Trail Blazers center Deandre Ayton misses game due to being unable to get to the arena on account of icy weather conditions

I’ve been following sports for pretty much all of my entire lucid life, and in all those years, this is honestly the first time that I’ve ever heard of a scenario where a player basically called out due to the weather.  This is the kind of shit that a college student says when they don’t want to get up for an 8 am class, or a shitty American babysitter says when they’re checked out.

But an NBA player?  Especially one who’s making $32M to play fucking basketball?  Mind blown.

Like, I’m sure because he’s mega rich, he lives a little bit in seclusion, because that’s what rich people tend to like to do.  And I know Portland is a weird place, in terms of people, as well as geography, and they’re kind of subject to the shitty weather conditions that afflict Seattle and the rest of the Pacific Northwest, but you’d think a go-zillionaire like an NBA player like Deandre Ayton would have some sort of contingency plan for icy roads.

Honestly, it’s not entirely on the player too, the team itself could’ve taken better preparation for this, like putting up him and other players in a baller hotel right near the arena or something if there was any indication that the weather was going to go tits up on game day.

Imagine if something like this occurred in the MJ era of the NBA?  Ayton would be destroyed by a Charles Oakley type of veteran meat mountain, on his own team as well as opponent.  Guys like Alonzo Mourning or Karl Malone would be all up his ass crack, giving him shit for having the audacity to miss a game due to icy roads.  He must live at Castle Black or something and the Kingsroad was just too coated with northern ice or something.

Whatever though, unsurprisingly the best part of this whole situation is the backlash it’s gotten on the internet, and when people collectively get mad at something, the clowns occasionally deliver some hilarious observations.  I think my favorites that I’ve seen so far are:

Pretty funny the Trail Blazers of all teams could not blaze a trail for DeAndre Ayton.

And then there was this one that is clearly familiar with Ayton’s game in general, and spun his joke to hilarious effect:

I realize Ayton couldn’t drive to the game, but perhaps he could have done several spin moves, each taking him slightly further from the rim to the game.

In all fairness though, as critical I feel towards the situation and carte blanche to criticize, I have to admit that sometimes, there’s fewer things more entertaining than the bullshit that comes from the NBA players themselves.  Between the Pistons trying their best to become the de facto worst team in league history, and clowns like Ayton calling out due to black guys ice, I can’t say I’ve paid more attention to the NBA in a long time.

Snowpocalypse 2019, Super Bowl Leee, etc.

I find myself in a position where I suddenly have some down time, and for lack of better things to do, I kind of feel like I should feel like writing.  Meetings are still consuming the vast majority of my work days, but for some reason, my afternoon meeting(s) have been pushed back to a later time, so kind of out the blue, I’ve got this patch of time, and I’ve already exhausted my usual rounds of internet surfing during my morning meeting(s), so I guess I’ll try to help the time pass by writing about some things that I don’t necessarily want to spend an entire post writing about, but aren’t so bad consolidated into a singular post.

So, earlier in the week, the City of Atlanta for the most part, shut down.  On Monday, the news was that an unavoidable snow storm was converging onto the southeast, including Georgia, and that by Tuesday morning, snow was all but guaranteed.  Mind you, all of Monday was around the high 50’s, and by the time I left the office, had topped out at 60F degrees.  It was such a beautiful day, I went home and threw the ball for big dog, since if the weather were to come true, there wouldn’t be another chance any time soon for ball time to occur.

As night rolled in, the temperature did start to drop, and I could feel that thickness in the air that typically seems to come with snow, but I couldn’t help but think in my mind how funny it would be if Snowpocalypse was some massive false call, and that nothing was to occur.  I had already taken contingency plans as far as work was concerned, and made sure to collect numbers from my employees, just in case I had to let them know that the office was closed in the morning.  The news kept pushing back the arrival of the impending snow from 11 pm to 3 am, and by the time I went to sleep, it was around 5 am.  I went to bed, expecting to see snow on the ground by the time I woke up.

And naturally, there was none.  I’m glad I didn’t alter my routine and stay up late because snow was all but guaranteed, and fuck myself from waking up.  I texted all my employees and made the day optional on account of the updated news that by 10-11 am, SNOW WAS GOING TO COME, but otherwise went into the office myself.  Went ot the gym, ran cardio, showered, and then went upstairs to my desk, where I had a pretty routine day; and since I’m seated next to the window, I had a front row seat to the small amount of misting that occurred, but no snow actually fell.

The picture above is a pretty accurate representation of what Snowpocalypse 2019 looked like in Atlanta.

Continue reading “Snowpocalypse 2019, Super Bowl Leee, etc.”

Snow day lol

I was a little jealous of those lucky enough to have Presidents Day off, despite the fact that I typically get every other holiday as well as Confederate Memorial Day off, because I’m greedy, and I want to slack when everyone else is slacking too.  Needless to say, work was on the agenda for today.

Thankfully, the City of Atlanta and the State of Georgia have become a little sensitive to criticism following the embarrassment that was the way Snowpocalypse 2014 was handled, and have decided to err on conservative, by being preventative as opposed to reactionary.  That being said, today is a snow day, and my office is closed.

As you can very well see in this photographic evidence taken this morning, my backyard is clearly a frozen tundra, and a baby wooly mammoth that looks precariously like my dog is traversing the land Pangaea to seek warmth and sustenance.

This pleases me.

This is what is crippling Atlanta this week

It’s hard to tell from this shot of my backyard, but although it doesn’t look like a whole lot, there’s a lot of ice coating everything. This ice has managed to knock out all the power in my neighborhood and this has been the case for the last four hours.

I’m posting this from my warm bed, where I will remain for the next few hours, reading books I guess. While I have some daylight, I may as well get started on the 924 page behemoth, Haruki Murakami’s 1Q84. And when I lose daylight, then it’s iPad kindle.

geeg Mother Nature, geeg.

You spoony weather!

I am working from home today, on account of offices being closed due to inclimate weather.  It’s certainly chilly outside, and there’s constant rain falling, but it’s not exactly the Icepocalypse that the weather was condemning.  Supposedly the brunt of this current polar snap is going to be tomorrow, and that it will be no laughing matter then.

I can’t really complain though.  Given the embarrassment of massive proportions suffered by the city and state from Snowpocalypse a few weeks ago, I’m not the least bit surprised to see the state going the route of hyper-sensitive and preemptively reactionary as opposed to sitting on their thumbs and letting the entire state turn into the joke of the entire world all over again.

Speaking of jokes though, I couldn’t resist.  Feeble Tellah dropping the piddly Ice-1 onto the city for massive damage seems about right in my perspective.  When the day is over, it’s still going to be ice, and the State of Georgia will really never be able to prepare for it, aside from doing what they can to make sure people stay indoors and off the roads.

But at least I don’t have to change out of sleep clothes, and can relax a little bit as long as no assignments come through the work email.

Still stuck at home on account of Snowpocalypse

This is a picture of the outside of my house.  If you notice, the ice on the roads has melted a good bit, yet precisely where the asphalt of the street begins right outside of my driveway, the ice has not melted, and is still somewhat thick.  My office has been closed for two days now and I’m fairly confident that they will be open tomorrow, but the thing is that this ice directly in front of my driveway is still going to be somewhat complicating, especially in the early AM hours when I am expected to be heading to work.

It doesn’t look like a lot of ice to traverse to get back onto solid asphalt, but the thing is that it’s going uphill, and my car is front-wheel drive and compact (read: lightweight); there’s no guarantee that it will be an easy task.  Conversely, I could always go downhill, and loop around on another side street of my suburban sprawl, but what’s not seen in the picture is how much further beyond my house that the ice continues to be present, all on a downhill.  I’ve seen cars sliding down my street in the past, and I’d rather not be one of them myself.

Continue reading “Still stuck at home on account of Snowpocalypse”

Snowpocalyptic musings

As it seems to be the case every three to five years in Atlanta, snow has befallen our fine city.  As it seems to be the case every time it happens, the entire city is in utter chaos; as the city and the state are ill-equipped when it comes to snow removal equipment, the roads often go unsalted and unplowed, and as the temperatures dip, everything freezes solid, and it’s safe to say that for the next day or three, it will be a very, very bad idea to get in a car and attempt to drive anywhere.  The irony in this statement is the fact that it’s literally two inches of snow that’s causing all this mayhem, because the city and state are completely incapable of clearing it from the roads.

The last time Snowpocalypse hit Atlanta, I ended up missing an entire week of work, which at the time was most definitely not a good thing, because I was still doing freelance work, therefore not being at work meant that I was not getting paid.  However, this time around, the circumstances are different, and I’m not terribly penalized by Mother Nature’s horseman.

Continue reading “Snowpocalyptic musings”