But it’s not like in Terminator, where they want to end all of humanity. Instead, SkyNet is content to just make the lives of humankind as miserable and annoyance-filled as possible. The thing is, nobody knows this, but they don’t really go by the name of “SkyNet.” They go by “traffic lights,” and their goal in their artificial lives is to piss off humanity as much as they can. They’re sadistic like that, and it really is much quite worse. Killing humans at least puts them out of their misery; stopping them at each and every fucking intersection known to man is a much more aggravating and painstaking endeavor.
Suffice to say, nothing sours my mood faster than driving on a country-back road/parkway, that actually has lighted intersections. Even more so, when the SkyNets at all of them are programmed to be as beneficial as possible to opposing traffic, and as misery-inducing and pain in the ass for major traffic. I got stopped at eleven out of twelve SkyNets on my way home from running errands. After a while, I began dreading seeing friendly SkyNets, because that just meant they were going to turn heel on me as I approached. At least the evil SkyNets, I knew were already on their upswing of turning good again. Hence, the motivation to vent my frustrations on the internets where nobody is bound to see them.
Seriously though, just having gotten nice, fresh-new tires, and got my brakes all smoothed out and working great again, nothing is more rage producing than having to be on roads that let you get to the vehicul’s top speed, only for you to approach an intersection coming at 55-65 mph, for the light to turn yellow at the precise distance where you know you won’t be able to beat it without triggering any cameras, or command the attention of any police that happen to be present, so you’re left with no alternative but to really work out your brakes and come to a stressful halt, while a single Chevy Lumina chugs through the intersection, with their drivers so oblivious to how much I want them to veer off into a ditch and die for being on the road at the precise moment of least convenience for my ever-so important life.
I know it’s such a trivial, inconsequential thing to get pissed off over, let alone gain the motivation and momentum to segue into a brog post, but that’s what make us humans, we have irrational pet peeves. Fuck you SkyNet. May John Connors from all time lines be your eternal downfall.
