A long time ago, for whatever reason, there was some sort of beef between Hercules Hernandez and Sid Justice. I don’t care to know the nature of this beef, but regardless when they were put together in a singles match, it turned into this hilarious 30-second squash match where Hercules refused to flat out sell (pretend to get hurt) by anything that Sid did, before the match concluded quickly with Sid delivering a powerbomb where Hercules dead-fished it and popped right back up and walked away upon the three count. Supposedly Herc was fired after this display, but aside from making the smarks laugh, he made Sid’s persona look weaker than it was arduously built up to be.
Not quite as long ago, when Bill Goldberg was rising in WCW, he was slated to have a match with former English circus shooter, Steven Regal. I say “have a match,” because Goldberg couldn’t actually wrestle, so I couldn’t really say “wrestled.” But it was something that Regal felt the obligation to exploit, to the fans, to management, and to the other boys in the back whom might also be jaded by the rapid and aggressive pushing of Goldberg. Whereas Goldberg had been having 30-180 second squash matches for weeks on end, Regal put him through a gauntlet of basic wrestling holds and chess moves that Goldberg was completely incapable of, on national television, getting out of or countering. After the display, Regal was fired, and soon after jumped to the WWF, but the damage was done; most everyone knew definitively that Goldberg couldn’t actually wrestle.
In 2000, there was a match involving the aforementioned Goldberg, but against steroid-monster Scott Steiner. I wasn’t astutely aware of any conflict between the two, but for whatever reason, the match turned into this drawn out festival of sandbagging (dead-weighting into flash lift-moves) and stiff attacks (real hits), but I’m guessing it had to do with Goldberg probably not being happy he had to job, considering he had a two-year long undefeated streak just a year prior.
More recently, as in within five years, there was an incident involving a match between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels; supposedly Michaels was not pleased with the idea that the Hulkster should get the win over him in their “legend versus icon” matchup, and being the notorious passive-aggressive saboteur throughout his career, Michaels decided to grieve his unhappiness in the ring. Completely opposite to the Hercules methodology, Michaels did a complete 180, and sold each and every thing Hulk Hogan did to him like he was being hit with a hydrogen bomb. Hogan still got the win in the end, but it was a complete mockery where even the most naive and believing-it’s-real wrestling fans would even imagine to be a bit of a charade.
The list goes on and on throughout the history of professional wrestling, but since I’m clearly a master of long-overly drawn out introductory paragraphs, I’ll get right to the point now. This past Monday night appeared to be a situation where some sabotage occurred, in a match between the Goldberg/Rhyno clone that I don’t like/refuse to support, Ryback, and the Japanese-repacking of formerly Prince Albert, TENSAI.
Albert’s not a terrible guy I wouldn’t imagine, but he’ll always be a favored punching bag throughout his career due to his excessive back hair, general physical unattractiveness, and the fact that he really can’t wrestle. He’s had a fairly long career being “a hoss” AKA a large man with wrestling training, but he’ll never be taken seriously as a legitimate champion. But for what it’s worth, he’s done his job throughout his career, and has done the job against many guys throughout the years, and of course, has taken the signature moves from just about everyone.
For whatever reason on Monday, I would accuse that Albert dropped the sandbag on Ryback, when Ryback attempted his signature maneuver on him. It was actually pretty hilarious when it happened, because my first thought was “SANDBAG.” In fact, I’m pretty sure the only reason I watched the match in the first place, because I was curious to see if Ryback could get a man of Albert’s girth up in his move, so when the moment came for it to happen, I was captivated.
The fact that it ended up being sandbagged was riotous to me, and I literally bust out laughing. My guess is a message was being sent about how Ryback actually has no offensive moveset, and you could pretty much see the look on Ryback’s face after it occurred, because he literally had no idea what to do next. The fact that the match ultimately ended on a fucking clothesline; a move he had already done 50 times prior the match-ender, went to show just how limited Ryberg actually is.
The real tell will be what happens to Albert in coming weeks. If he hasn’t already been fired, he’ll be put in a series of matches where he jobs unceremoniously to unworthy talent, or he’ll be saddled with a really lame babyface gimmick. But if the intention was to make Ryback look bad and weaker than he’s been built up to be, just as he’s just beginning to sow the seeds for a main-event storyline, the mission was a success.
