The tin-foil hat perils of waiting too long

mj laughing last dance

I kind of think it’s fake news: Mr. and Mrs. Baked Potato Head test positive for coronavirus

When I woke up in the morning to a text message from mythical wife lol’ing over this news, I also lol’d.  I took my sweet time getting to my computer this morning, because I anticipated most all of my friends were also lol’ing over the internet, and I wanted to dedicate a slice of time in which I could also lol with them, and hope to see a smorgasbord of ironically topical memes.

By the time I opened up my browser, theFacebook and my email, it was everything that I had expected to be, like a conga line of memes, jokes and all sorts of stuff clowning on the baked potato, and the irony that the guy who had spent the better part of the year acting as if coronavirus was a hoax, wasn’t real, was just diagnosed with it.

It truly is the epitome of irony, and couldn’t have happened to a more appropriate person on the entire planet.

I fully intended on writing about such ironies, and I had already picked out some gifs to use with this image, because the hardest thing at that time was deciding on which of the Michael Jordan laughing from The Last Dance gifs was more appropriate for the ensuing post.

But then this shit called ‘work’ kind of took precedence, and in spite of my want to write about the hilarious appropriateness of a clown who denouncing an illness getting it himself.  And as the day progressed, and I began to hear little bits and pieces and the occasional opinions from others, my friends included, most notably all of the potential conspiracies and the obvious revelations that almost no news that has been reported, has actually come from anywhere but the White House itself, leading to tremendous skepticism of its validity, due to the fact that everyone knows just who currently occupies it.

I am obviously no stranger to conspiracy theories, and I enjoy coming up with wild and outlandish theories on my own, but given the track history of this entire presidential term, I can’t help but have this sneaking suspicion that there is entirely the possibility that this is all one elaborate hoax, in order to politicize the whole situation, discredit the media, diminish the reality of the devastation of coronavirus, and turn the tables into some political strategy in order to regain momentum in the upcoming presidential election.

Short of some legitimate concrete evidence, from someone like Dr. Fauci himself, I’m dubious on whether or not I actually believe that Mr. and Mrs. Baked Potatohead actually have coronavirus.  I can easily see this as a ploy to avoid having to participate in further presidential debates, and hope to keep a lower profile going into November, with hopes that Joe Biden messes something up himself and costs himself a bunch of voters.

The timing seems too suspect for me, because if he so-call quarantines for two weeks, and emerges in mid-October healthy as a horse again, he’s going to declare some pyrrhic victory over what he’s repeatedly and racist-ly calling China Virus, and because his voter base is below idiotic, they’re going to be energized and inspired, and they’ll pack the votes for him like they always do and hope to carry the momentum all the way into November.

The point of all this is that I had woken up and earlier in the day been full of lols and glee and trollish happiness that the baked potato had actually caught coronavirus, but as the day went on, and I’ve read more opinions and had more time myself to digest and think about the scenario, now I’m not quite so sure that I believe it, and in fact, think it’s more likely to be a political ploy that completely saps and drains all the fun and entertainment of the whole scenario to begin with.

And I think that’s ultimately been the whole strategy of this administration from the day he ran for president, and it just fucking sucks that it always has the capability to ruin literally just about everything out there.  All I can really do is hope that what I think is fake news is actually fake, and by doing so, means it’s actually real.  And because the baked potato falls into the highest at-risk demographic, I’m not explicitly saying that I hope anyone dies, but what happens, happens, and if the odds happen to fall in favor, I guess that’s that.

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