What exactly can possibly be illegal about eyelashes?

No seriously, I’m genuinely curious to the marketing behind this cosmetic product.  “Illegal Length” mascara?  What could possibly be illegal about the length of one’s eyelashes?

Does lengthening eyelashes from 3/16th of an inch to a full 1/8th trigger some carnal rape mechanism in surrounding men, forcing them onto women, giving them a legal reason to sue and cash in?

Does lengthening eye lashes with this stuff make eyelashes long and spiny as a porcupine’s spines, and just as lethal?  Where women with this stuff applied can literally peck things to death with their illegally-long eyelashes?

Does putting this stuff on your eyelashes give your eyelashes the ability to light-write racist and anti-Semitic remarks in public places?

Because if neither of these are true, I can’t really fathom how anything could possibly make eyelashes illegal.  I get that there is a perceived arousing/sexy appeal to the naughty and forbidden, and “illegal” describes just that, but c’mon, this is for fucking eyelashes.  What’s illegal about eyelashes?  If this is the precedent being set by companies, and attempting to appeal to the lowest, horniest denominator, I may as well go put the patent on “Super Sexy Doritos,” “Illegal Water,” and “Forbidden Cereal.”

What does this Korean kid have in common with Brian Urlacher?

They’re both professionals.

Obviously, I can’t use the term “athlete” for the professional gamer, because there’s absolutely nothing athletic about PC gaming.  No matter how much professional gaming tries to imbue physical statistics into gaming, like how fast a guy can click on a mouse.

I came across this Kotaku article, and going through it it set off a wide range of emotions and thoughts, and here I sit, brogging away about it.  It’s no secret to me these days that gaming is taken pretty seriously back in the Motherland, and even my parents have made the backhand remark that perhaps I should have gone somewhere with my own adolescent gaming habits, regardless of how hard they disapproved it back then.  But it’s gotten to the point in Korea, where I kind of look at how seriously it’s taken, and feel nothing but a wide range of negatively-connotative emotions.

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Real Men Don’t Wear Small update: Riverwalk Stadium, Montgomery, Alabama

My latest baseball travels took me out to Montgomery, Alabama for some minor league baseball action.  There, I visited Riverwalk Stadium, home of the Montgomery Biscuits, the AA affiliates of the Tampa Bay Rays.  Out of all of the minor league ballparks that I’ve been to, I would rank Riverwalk Stadium very high up on it, and it’s easily the best park I’ve been to out of the paltry four AA parks I’ve visited.  The best part about it is that it’s close enough to where I’d actually consider going again in the future.

Unfortunate sequence of burnt out bulbs, right?

This can’t be a coincidence, right?  I don’t really believe that this is a matter of “IFT’s” bulbs all burning out at exactly the right time, as much as it has to be an attempt at a practical joke by whomever works at this store.

My first guess is that it’s whomever has the unfortunate duty of working the second shift at this place decided to do some passive-aggressive sabotage, by killing off the bulbs.  The owner(s), whom I guess don’t ever really see this place with the sun down, never will notice; everyone else, once the sun sets and the lights come on, are effectively granted permission to predictable exclaim that “they found the G-spot!”

Or, it’s some truly meta tactics employed by the business itself, and utilizing the seemingly innocuously coincidental inconvenience of burnt out bulbs to their advantage, and suckering people into stopping by, based on nothing but perverted curiosity.  Personally, I only pulled off to the side, snapped my picture, and ran off.  But as you can see, there is someone emerging from the place, so it could be that it actually works.

As much as I would loved to have said that I saw this in Alabama, given my last two Sundays spent out there, it’s actually here in Georgia.  The interesting and suspicious thing about it is that this photo was taken on a Sunday night; pretty much, in the God-fearing south, most businesses are closed by this time, if they even bothered to open at all on a Sunday.  Which piques my curiosity that it really might be possibility #2, since they might be trying to capitalize on the draw of a funny name and accommodate possible customers.  Also interesting is the fact that I’m pretty sure they don’t sell anything at all remotely sexual.  I always thought it was just a place for stereotypical black womens’ clothing.

Photos: A day in Montgomery, Alabama

The pursuit of travel and baseball took me down to Montgomery, Alabama for a day, to take in some local sights, and eventually watch some baseball.  Compared to Birmingham from just a week ago, I have to say that I liked Montgomery more.  Ironically, a lot of it has to do with the historic feel of the area, and walking around what I suppose was a major home of the Confederacy.

The first White House of the Confederacy is what’s pictured above, and it’s kind of interesting to think that I never heard of such a structure even existing in contemporary school, despite the fact that Virginia too was a “southern state.”

As much as I thought I would be looked at with a strange eye for being a Chinaman in Montgomery, Alabama, I was pleasantly surprised to have not really run into such incident.  Well, not openly.  Then again, being a Sunday afternoon, pretty much the entire city was deserted, except for the sparse church-goers and baseball enthusiasts at the park.  I’ll save the park opinions for when I eventually update the baseball site, but as for the rest of the pictures, beyond the jump.

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