$100k worth of noodles, 250 billion grams of sodium

Pretty sure the container was more valuable than the cargo: truck containing allegedly $100,000 worth of ramen noodles stolen from rural Georgia gas station overnight parking

I know the article states that it was a semi-truck, but I have a hard time believing that something the size of a semi could actually contain $100k worth of ramen noodles.  Especially if they were actually like the cheap shit Maru-chan noodles that are like 10¢ a package, but the article doesn’t actually specify the brand of noodles taken.

Instead, I imagine that the only thing remotely capable of hauling $100k worth of ramen noodles would have to be one of those land train trucks that’s basically a semi hauling 3-4 cargo containers in succession, like the one in Fast & Furious 4 that Vin Diesel stole one of the tankers of gas from.  Maybe, only maybe, would a truck hauling four containers worth of ramen noodles actually amount to close to $100k.

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Furiously excited for more Fast logos

Among some of my guiltiest of guilty pleasures is my general love for The Fast and the Furious film franchise. I mean, when I was a wannabe car tuner who thought everything JDM was god-like, and wanted to do a laundry list of things to the cars that I’ve driven, I watched the first film with that “it’s going to suck, but I’m going to watch it, so I can criticize everything wrong with it,” oblivious to the irony that I was forking over my money to feed the machine regardless.

Eventually, the arrogance and false sense of superiority dissipated AKA I began to grow up, and it turned out that I actually enjoyed these terrible films. Yes, I enjoy them, but there’s little denying the fact that they’re really campy, over-the-top films. My mom would watch it and call it an “엉터리 movie,” which translated literally means “nonsense.” Whatever though, I still enjoy them, and I can admit that I have seen every single one.

Needless to say, I was amused by the announcement by Vin Diesel who used social media to drop the news that not only is the FF franchise continuing for an eighth installment, but there are plans to have a ninth, and a tenth installment of the story, so that the franchise can literally boast ten films in twenty years. Also amusing are their tentative April release dates, so I can probably pull out the birthday card and force mythical girlfriend to go see them with me. hue hue.

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Why I like the Fast and Furious franchise

I don’t even know where to begin talking about Furious7.  Except that I enjoyed it, and I had more than one case of the feels admittedly, watching it; whether it was from the farewell piecemealed together for Paul Walker and his character, or the repeated monologues spouted by Vin Diesel about the importance of family.

Sure, it was a completely absurd movie, as every single one in the franchise was, and there was no length too far for the action sequences to go just a little bit more over the top than the one before it.  Who cares about the logic of how like a Somalian mercenary terrorist with a troupe of very American-sounding mercs manages to get a helicopter armed to the teeth with an accompanying Predator drone into Los Angeles airspace without alerting everyone in the city until it starts firing upon Toretto & Co.  Who cares about Kurt Russell basically being Nick Fury with SHIELD behind him?  Where does Dominic Toretto seem to house his endless supply of classic muscle cars that he just ends up destroying one after another?

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BEST WORST HOLIDAY

Ahh, it’s that time of the year when I can wake up on a Monday morning, and not feel the anxious feeling of knowing that I have a finite amount of time to brush my teeth, get dressed, let the dog out, and get out on the road, before a very tiny window of time that separates a 45-minute commute from a 60+ minute commute.

For it is Confederate Memorial Day observed in the great state of Georgia, and I do not have to work today.

This is kind of like the feeling of watching your favorite sports team’s arch-rivals losing to a third party.  After your favorite sports team has already lost for the day.

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Either I’m growing up, or WHY HONDA, WHY??

Impetus: Honda announces the next Civic Type-R(RRRRRRRRRRRR) will be released globally, meaning the United States will finally get the Civic Type-R for the first time.

Too bad it looks like Kermit the Frog was abducted by Storm Troopers, and enough scientific engineering were done to successfully mate a puppet with the general look of a suit of armor, resulting in this lime green turd.

Seriously, when I saw this picture of the new Civic Type-R, the first one that would be available in the United States, this is the first thing that popped into my head:

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Knowledge is horsepower

Conversely, that means a lack of knowledge means your car might be slower than it should be.

Long gone are the days when I used to relish in the occasional red light skirmish; trying to get to point B from the green light faster than a car in an adjacent lane.  But nowadays I’m older, I just don’t really care about it anymore, and frankly the cost of fuel is more than justifiable enough to not hit 6,000 rpm in first gear and second gear, just to prove that my car is faster than another.

But when a 3rd generation Mitsubishi Eclipse deliberately pulls up next to me with the intent of attempting to pass me on an upcoming merge point, so that they don’t have to wait behind the three cars behind me, I decided that could turn the clock back a little bit.

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Why I like Fast Five so much

I have a rather tall friend whose parents happen to be from Brazil.  He is a kind and gentle giant of a friend, and I rather enjoy having his friendship.  His sister once inadvertently, unknowingly prevented me from getting pulled over a long time ago, by setting the mother of all automotive picks on the road, allowing me the time necessary to duck into a small neighborhood until I ditched the star.  Anyway, he, his parents, as well as his sister gave me good faith that Brazilians were good persons.

Well, I take that all back, and recognize my eight-foot tall friend and his family as clearly exceptions to the rule, or products of having lived in America for so long.  Because after playing League of Legends for as long as I’ve been playing now, I’ve come to the interim conclusion that Brazilians are the most insufferable, obnoxious and griefing people on the face of the planet.

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