I do my best thinking in the car

I really do. It’s like I do my best typing when I’ve got my feet kicked up on my desk, and I have the wireless keyboard in my lap. I don’t know why that is, but I feel like my fingers fly along the keys when it’s in this position. But back to the topic of thinking, I guess “best” isn’t necessarily the best word, but it’s true that I do some of my deepest thinking while I’m driving in my car.

Lately, something that pops into my head a lot, which is probably obvious given my age and life’s status, but I’m kind of a lonely person. I’m probably being more earnest than I really should be, given the fairly public status of my brog, but to put it out there, I’m 31 years old, and I haven’t been on a date in about two years now. Ultimately, there’s nobody to blame for such circumstances except for myself, but to be perfectly honest, I kind of don’t even know where to begin.

It’s not like I can go to Publix and be all like “oh, you’ve got one item? Please, go ahead” in the checkout line, and strike up a scintillating conversation with a random stranger, culminating with the birth of a blossoming relationship. No, it would result in us holding up the checkout line, people behind us getting pissed, the cashier getting impatient with our inconsiderate behavior, and a girl, who capitalized on my generosity getting the fuck out of the place even sooner because I was being a mush.

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An obligatory Varentine’s Day post

I use the term “obligatory” because honestly I’m starting this post without my idea of what I’m going to write, but I feel like writing something anyways, so I’m taking a stab at it regardless.

I’m single, and I’ve been single for the better part of the last, shit, seven years. Since then, my life as it pertains to romantic pursuits has been as sporadic as locust swarms, and if that analogy’s too discreet, it’s to say that I have gotten very, very little activity over a long period of time. It’s impossible for me to say that there’s really anyone to blame for this drought but myself, as I’d be the first to admit that I have as much game as the Sega Saturn, to which if that analogy is too obscure, it’s to say that I’ve got very little game, period.

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Desperately Seeking Shay

Whatcha reading?” she asked, coming down the lobby steps behind where I was sitting.

The voice was mostly unfamiliar, but I had an inkling of whom it could possibly be.  I looked up, and she was now in front of my table.  She smiled, and asked if anyone was sitting with me.  I said no.  She asked if I minded if she hung out for a little bit.  I smiled this time, and said by all means.  She sat down, drinking a strawberry daiquiri.  A waitress came by, and she ordered another.  I ordered another Bloody Mary.

We met briefly the night before.  Her table was next to mine during dinner.  She was in a party of three, with another couple.  When my table’s food arrived, both our tables got quiet, and all eyes were on the entrees brought out to us.  She glanced over and said to me that I should let her know how my entrée was.  I smirked and said will do.  In all honesty, despite thinking it was good initially, the more I think back to it, I didn’t really think it was all that great.  I ended up forfeiting half of it, because I was full on snack bar junk food, and the far superior seafood ceviche not too terribly long ago, and I simply didn’t want to finish this fish.

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I think I need to start dating again, so I can catch up on movies

The following is a list of movies back from 2011 to around today, that I wanted to see:

  • Captain America
  • The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
  • The Cabin in the Woods
  • Bridesmaids
  • 50/50
  • Spider-Man
  • Ted
  • The Avengers
  • Prometheus
  • The Hunger Games
  • Project X
  • Men in Black 3
  • The Dictator
  • Chernobyl Diaries
  • Seeking a Friend for the End of the World

I haven’t seen any of these movies.

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Photos: Carolyn & Joe’s Wedding

One by one, I watch as my closest friends all get married while I haven’t had a substantial date in over a  year now.  Que sera, sera.

No matter.  It was a joyous occasion that I got to enjoy the dubious honor of being a groomsman to the wedding of two of my closest friends, having known the bride since the seventh grade, and the groom since the eighth.  Unlike the popular notion that weddings are a drag and that they’re all boring and superficial, on the contrary, I happen to like them very much, even more so if those getting married are my own friends.  It’s always fun to see friends and acquaintances dressed to the nines, and the festive atmosphere which leads to people often putting on their best behavior.  A little bit of class doesn’t hurt nobody, on occasion.

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If everybody cheats, is it really sexy anymore?

It’s my opinion that today, we live in an era of antagonism.  There are people out there that take pride in being an asshole and make conscious efforts to make life more difficult for their fellow human beings, be it by deliberately being contrarian, intentionally acting in manners that makes a situation difficult for another, or to go on the internet with no purpose but to grief, troll, and pick fights and antagonize others, under the safe veil of anonymity.

I think we live in a time where overall positively-connotative morals are at an all-time low, and because it’s been like such for so long, there’s a manner of acceptance of it in lots of cases.  Some choose to laugh it off, others shake their heads at the state of our jaded society.  Personally, I think I do a little of both; sometimes it’s funny, but sometimes, I just feel like I have no faith in humanity.

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I always have unusual and lucid dreams at my parents’ house

Maybe its the ambient noise from the dehumidifier in my old basement, or maybe it’s the fact that I’m in completely pitch black darkness.  Maybe its the old blankets I used to use when I lived here nine years ago, on top of the mattresses which used to be my old bed.

Apparently, much like how I’ve signed up, or planned to be participating in many more runs and obstacle courses, in this dream, I had been running in several different zombie runs.  For all I know, this girl might have been one of the actual zombies I ran past just a few weeks ago.  But for intents and purposes, I had apparently run in zombie runs in Virginia, Toronto, Miami and Boston.  Each time, I noticed that I came across this one girl who was always participating in her own right, as a zombie.

The encounters were always brief, since I always in escape mode most of the time, but with this girl, I always lingered.  Whether it was because I was playing possum, or it was a one-on-one encounter, leading me to take my time and attempt to get up in their grill before trying to get around them.  The fact of the matter was that I kept running into the same girl several times over, and she was apparently appealing to me, even all dressed up as a zombie.

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