This is a picture of the outside of my house. If you notice, the ice on the roads has melted a good bit, yet precisely where the asphalt of the street begins right outside of my driveway, the ice has not melted, and is still somewhat thick. My office has been closed for two days now and I’m fairly confident that they will be open tomorrow, but the thing is that this ice directly in front of my driveway is still going to be somewhat complicating, especially in the early AM hours when I am expected to be heading to work.
It doesn’t look like a lot of ice to traverse to get back onto solid asphalt, but the thing is that it’s going uphill, and my car is front-wheel drive and compact (read: lightweight); there’s no guarantee that it will be an easy task. Conversely, I could always go downhill, and loop around on another side street of my suburban sprawl, but what’s not seen in the picture is how much further beyond my house that the ice continues to be present, all on a downhill. I’ve seen cars sliding down my street in the past, and I’d rather not be one of them myself.
So, unless a good bit more ice melts, regardless of the state of my office’s operating, I may still run the risk of not being able to go to work tomorrow too. It’s like playing an older Final Fantasy, where literally the only thing stopping you from going out into the vast and expansive world map is one town guard perfectly positioned at the one-tile wide exit, waiting for you to fight some ghost or do some menial task before he leaves you alone.
Make no mistake, as much as I have enjoyed sleeping in the last two days, I’m pretty ready for Snowpocalypse 2014 to be something in the past now. Not because of the cold weather, not because of the cabin fever, but primarily to be beyond all the incessant chatter and arguments and white knighting I’m seeing all over social media and the news about the topic. I get it, Atlanta and Georgia are unequipped for the snow, the city and state’s government is full of incompetent greedy bureaucrats who don’t care about the population, and laugh at us if you will but that makes you an asshole especially if you don’t know the facts and you’re still a dick even if you do.
I think there’s something about me that doesn’t like pity, because I find it grating when people out there are expressing themselves with this ‘woe is Atlanta’ opinion. Yes, it is unfortunate and somewhat pathetic the whole way Snowpocalypse has turned out, but it really, really could have been much, much worse. Sure, there were people “tragically” stuck at Publix, Home Depot, or stuck at school or a place of business overnight, however there were also a few unfortunate people stuck in their cars in the cold in a much worse place.
I don’t deal with pity well on any scale, whether it’s people who say sorry for menial things like getting laid off by ScumTrust, or whenever the Braves choke in the playoffs if they even make it in the first place, or like when I’m stuck at home because of two inches of ice that has frozen over all over the roads of my city. I don’t know why, I just don’t like it. I guess I just don’t like it when people assume that I, or something that I feel some connection to, is seen in a light of being weak and helpless. I think at any given point in time, there’s usually way more important things to be piteous towards than trite things like adverse weather or sports teams. Now not lost on me is that I’ve probably said sorry to people about similar things in the past and likely will in the future, which makes me a hypocrite, but it’s also because I’m also not the greatest conversationalist in the world, and sometimes I think I say things just to break the silence. Then again, some people secretly like garnering pity too, I’m just not one of them.
Whenever I see a blog post or a news article about the futility of Atlanta, most of the time it makes me a little depressed. If they’re not blasting Atlanta from their northern cities or snow-accustomed regions, then they’re Southerners who are blasting those who aren’t necessarily aware of all the facts. There’s no middle ground with the tone of these articles popping up throughout the last few days on account of most people and outlets trying to stay relevant with the news. It’s attack, or defense, but with the same level of furor regardless. I can’t say that I’d be the most qualified person on the planet to try and find that happy compromise, but I do think that I have the capability of writing in a more neutral and level-headed tone than many have attempted already.
Although that being said, I do wish to commend Rebecca Burns for her the probably best take on the entire debacle to come from this shitstorm.
I think Atlanta jokes are kind of like your mom jokes – it’s okay if I make them, but I roll my eyes and dismiss the credibility of those who aren’t here or aren’t somewhat intimately familiar with the city. Sure, I still find humor in the memes that I think are legitimately clever, and I’m open to everyone’s opinions, but if it’s apparent that there’s a lack of understanding of the reality behind how two inches of snow can cripple a metropolitan area, then I can’t really take it seriously.
I’d share my opinion more readily on social media, but apparently I can’t even do that without ruffling any feathers anymore, so my own personal brog with low readership is the way to best express it moving forward, and I look forward to when this is past all of us, and I can look for inspiration to write about other things like video games, wrestling, sports or other lame attempts at humor.